We’ve all been there: it’s a typical work day when suddenly you receive bad news, and your world is turning upside down. Your heart starts beating, your mind starts running, negative emotions build up and you are ready to burst. How do you deal with negative emotions at work?
The cognitive process that influences how we deal with negative emotions coming our way is called emotion regulation. Emotion regulation strategies can differ from person to person. Some people may choose to cry, while others keep all the feels locked in. But keep in mind, how you choose to express your emotions not only impacts your well-being but also the well-being of people around you.
This article will help you understand more about how to deal with negative emotions, why it is important to address your negative feelings and how to emotionally adapt in the face of stress. Let’s dive into our emotions.
How do you deal with negative emotions at work?
Most people try to deal with negative emotions in ways they think it benefits them. Here are the most common strategies people often use:
Distraction – Disregarding negative emotions
For example, when getting bad news from work, you might focus your attention on other things like social media or other work tasks that help you take your mind off your emotions.
Suppression – Hiding negative emotions
This usually happens when you might think: “I won’t show my emotions, otherwise I can look weak”.
Reappraisal – Redefining our emotions
This strategy can also be called “looking at the bright side”. That’s when you take a negative situation and try to focus on the good part.
3 Key elements that help you effectively deal with negative emotions at work
How do people select their strategies? Under what conditions do you choose your emotion regulation strategy? What strategy is better for which context?
The answer is: emotion regulation flexibility.
That means there is no one-size fits all strategy to deal with negative emotions in the workplace. Whether you can successfully regulate your emotions depends on three aspects. Let’s dig in through each of them.
1. Repertoire
The more strategies you have in your repertoire, the more likely it is that you will successfully deal with the negative event. In a study, participants who use a larger number of regulation strategies reported less cumulative life stress, while those will fewer strategies reported more distress. Therefore, it is important to not only possess a large number of strategies but also to know when to use which. Studies show that regulation flexibility can help people go through aversive events. If you are someone who is in constant stressful environments, you will adjust better if you are more emotionally flexible. Thus, It is crucial to acquire more regulation strategies and learn how to modify them according to context.
2. Context
Contexts are important for emotion regulation, because of rules of conduct at play. At work, employees may choose to suppress their negative emotions because the context does not allow them to display anger and frustration. At home however, you may feel more free to express your emotions or distract yourself with some hobbies. The more flexible you are, the easier it is to switch strategies according to contexts.
3. Feedback
Feedback about how effective strategy X has proven to be in context Y decides whether that strategy is useful or should be discarded. Even though you may be flexible, there are times when it is difficult to apply a certain regulation strategy. That means, that what might be effective in the beginning of a stressful situation, might prove ineffective later.
To illustrate, here’s a silly example from my personal experience. During my last flight, heavy turbulences disrupted me from enjoying a nice game of Sudoku. In the beginning, I told myself it’s nothing, and continued playing. I tried to distract myself from the anxiety building up in my body. After a while however, it stopped working. The more I tried to force myself not to think about it the more anxious I became. So, I chose to stop the game, and switch to another emotion regulation strategy: reappraisal. I started thinking that this will end soon and after that I will be able to see my family, whom I missed. Switching gears however, was only possible because I paid attention to the feedback I received. Thus, it is important that you readjust your strategy whenever it stops being efficient.
Why you should care about how you deal with negative emotions at work
The short answer is: it matters for your mental health and work outcomes. For example, when you engage in efficient emotion regulation, you are at a lower risk of burnout and exhaustion. That is because you can deal better with stress coming your way. Additionally, the better you can regulate the better your mood will become. Finally, your ability to regulate your emotions can help you achieve your goals because you become stronger in the face of adversity.
During COVID-19, emotion regulation strategies can have a great impact. Studies show that understanding your emotions, reflecting on them, and reappraising negative ones is more efficient than suppressing them. By engaging in such emotional self-care, you can also reduce stress and increase your energy levels.
Your emotions regulation strategies can also affect your relationship with others. Effective regulation can increase empathy, compassion and helping behaviours. Importantly, it can prevent you from bringing negative emotions from work into your home. Thus, flexible emotion regulation can also prevent family conflicts and help you provide emotional support to your partner.
Take care of your emotions, develop your flexibility and deal with negative ones efficiently.
must reads
How to Romanticise Your Corporate Summer
Summer is often synonymous with vacations, beach outings, and relaxation. But what if your…
July 6, 2024How to break free of your limiting beliefs
Have you ever come across a job posting for a great job position –…
July 10, 2023The key is habits: How to make consistency your ally for success
They say that when motivation is low, consistency is what matters for success. Think…
March 17, 2023This article is based on the following sources and academic articles
Bonanno, G. A., & Burton, C. L. (2013). Regulatory flexibility: an individual differences perspective on coping and emotion regulation. Perspectives on Psychological Science : A Journal of the Association for Psychological Science, 8(6), 591–612. https://doi.org/10.1177/1745691613504116
Côté, S. (2005). A social interaction model of the effects of emotion regulation on work strain. Academy of Management Review, 30, 509–530. doi:10.2307/20159142
Diefendorff, J. M., Richard, E. M., & Yang, J. (2008). Linking emotion regulation strategies to affective events and negative emotions at work. Journal of Vocational Behavior, 73(3), 498–508. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jvb.2008.09.006
Trougakos, J. P., Chawla, N., & McCarthy, J. M. (2020). Working in a pandemic: exploring the impact of covid-19 health anxiety on work, family, and health outcomes. Journal of Applied Psychology, 105(11), 1234–1245. https://doi.org/10.1037/apl0000739
Webb, T. L., Miles, E., & Sheeran, P. (2012). Dealing with feeling: A meta-analysis of the effectiveness of strategies derived from the process model of emotion regulation. Psychological Bulletin, 138(4), 775–808. https://doi-org.proxy-ub.rug.nl/10.1037/a0027600